This little bald fellow, is he your god?

They said, Oh, so they’re libertarian? I said: They were, once. But they’re really just the Protectors of the Smug at this point.

Aliens landed in the seaside village this morning.

Just like every other cruise tourist who gets carted over here by Fullers and dumped at the bus stop, they had that bewildered look that said,
How do you have fun here?

I took them by their goey rubbery arms and said,
Come with me.

First I pointed out 432 cafes to choose from.

Once they'd finished their l…